still singing bipolar blues

spent all day crying, then angry and hateful. sent some "farewell" texts telling people what they mean to me. couldn't find strength to do it. still here. stuck in the craziness. talked to therapist...wasn't in the mood. just kept telling her it didn't matter. i would get over it. however, when i feel like this, it is hard to believe that i will. i am so tired of this. so, anyway, therapist told me to call my nurse practitioner because it may be related to feeling overwhelmed/anxiety. called her. she told me to take klonopin twice a day and call her on monday. now, lying on couch zoned out. still feel bad inside but body practically paralyzed. do people really like this feeling? i don't. so, now what? hell if i know. probably sleep. lots of sleep. "sleep...those tiny pieces of death, how i loathe thee"--edgar allen poe. he was probably bipolar, too. thanks for listening. ang